emo·tion

noun \i-ˈmō-shən\

: a strong feeling (such as love, anger, joy, hate, or fear)

If there is one fact that has transcended the generations, it is that emotion, or more specifically the inability to “control” one’s emotions, is seen as weak. I believe this came about because women are more likely to show emotion. Also woman are often, or more likely always, thought of as the weaker gender, therefore emotion is a sign of weakness. This lie has been programmed into our society like a deadly virus that is slowly consuming the image God created us in, Himself. I know these seem like excessive words but stay with me a while and let me explain.

What has society taught us?

-Real men don’t cry.                                                                                                                                                                        -You can’t make sound judgments if you are emotional.

I was brought up in a society and culture that saw emotion as a weakness, I was told time and time again, to “stop being so emotional”, “come back and speak to me when you’re not so emotional”, “You must be stronger, not so emotional”. It’s not just me who has experienced this, but many others as well. For example, you see a person at the funeral of a loved one and they not displaying the emotion you expect, they not crying. Our first thought is ‘wow, look how strong they are’, but we have no idea of what they are experiencing on the inside.

I know so many strong women, both Christian and non, who train themselves to mask and hide their emotions. Why? Because the world, and also the church, has taught them that emotion is a sign of weakness. And the sad thing is, they very rarely get the release and freedom that the releasing of emotions brings. These woman aren’t in anyway radical feminists, they just don’t show that part of themselves, because they feel it wouldn’t be accepted.

I have a thought about how society and the church view emotion:                                                                                       “Woman get emotional, but men get passionate”.

You know it’s generally true. If a woman gets up to speak at church, and she starts trying to hold back tears so she can talk or she’s getting a bit loud, we think straight away that she a bit “too emotional”. However, if you see a man do the same thing and it’s seen in a positive light, its seen as passion.

You may be acutely aware of how hard it is to “control” your emotions. In the beginning it is so draining, but only after years of hard work and practice can one truly be “unemotional”. I’m sorry but when did we start trying to be a Vulcan alien race? (Side note for those who have no idea who the Vulcans are – “Vulcans are an extraterrestrial humanoid species in the Star Trek franchise who originate from the planet Vulcan. They are noted for their attempt to live by reason and logic with no interference from emotion” -Thank you Wikipedia.)

We wonder why so many people have issues around their identity, when we are asking them to be something different to who they were created to be.                                                                                                                                                          I believe it’s in our emotion we find our strength, because as soon as we stop trying to fight who we were created to be, we can put our energy into actually doing what God has called us to be and do.

We are told to look at Jesus, for how we should behave and respond to different situations. The cliché WWJD, what would Jesus do, mantra seems to creep in. But let’s have a look at what Jesus did with emotion.

John 11 tells the story of Lazarus’s death and his sisters Mary and Martha. In verse 32 Jesus sees Mary weeping at His feet, she’s heart-broken that she has lost her brother. Now we know from the beginning of this verse that Jesus intentionally waited till Lazarus was dead, because He was going to raise him from the dead “for the glory of God” (verse 4). So Jesus knew he wasn’t going to remain dead, but in verse 35 it says “Jesus wept”. He was literally about to raise the guy from the dead, He knew this, and yet still He chose to connect with Mary in that moment, He allowed His emotion to be seen.

Again we see Jesus showing emotion in Mark 3, when He asks the Pharisees if it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath. Verse 5 states “And when He had looked around at them with ANGER, being GRIEVED by the hardness of their hearts, He said to the man, ‘stretch out your hand.’ And he stretched it out, and his hand was restored as whole as the other.”

That is pretty strong emotions in just that one verse, how did the author, Mark, know what Jesus’ emotions were? How does anyone know what emotion another is feeling? The answer is that they show it. Jesus showed His emotions. And one of the most emotional ‘outbursts’, we find in John 2:13-19. Basically Jesus made a whip. Yes. He made a weapon, overturned tables in the temple and chased merchants out of the temple with said whip. Now if that’s not getting emotional, I don’t know what is!

One of the most powerful moments in the Bible for me is the moment just before Jesus is betrayed and He is asking Father God to take “this cup” (His sacrifice) from Him. We can see Jesus is in extreme turmoil, so much so that He was sweating blood. This rare condition only happens in times of extreme stress. There have been many historical instances of when soldiers going into battle, that knew they were facing death, would start sweating blood. Jesus knew exactly what was about to happen to Him, He knew the pain and suffering He was about to go through, and He knew He would rise 3 days later. My love for Jesus expands every time I look at this, because it was in this moment, that He saved us, by saying to God, “but not my will, but Yours be done.”  You see an action cannot happen without first deciding to do it, and this is where Jesus said YES to you and to me. His emotions were running high! His love for us over came the knowledge of what He was about to go through.

Jesus let His emotions show in the moment of His most important decision, and He chose us.                                             You see people who say you can’t make sound decisions when emotional, clearly haven’t read and understood Luke 22. Jesus made the greatest decision of His life in the midst of great emotion.

Jesus cried. He laughed. He got angry. He got emotional. So if our example is to be Jesus, and we are to live how He lived, we need to be allowed to show our emotion and more importantly be brave enough to show it.

I find I’m the strongest when I’m being who God created me to be. He created me to write. He created me to teach. He created me to dance. He created me to be emotional. So that is who I will choose to be. If the world judges me on that, then so be it, but I will not let the world steal what God created me to be.

So my parting question to you is: Will you be brave and not only let your emotions show, but allow others to show theirs?

“There is a sacredness in tears.

They are not the mark of weakness but of power.

They are messengers of overwhelming grief and

Of unspeakable love”

Washington Irving